


heartbreak | meanie

by bebishua



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-20 01:55:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15523509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bebishua/pseuds/bebishua
Summary: Mingyu wishes Wonwoo would stop breaking his heart, just once.Wonwoo doesn't even know he's breaking a heart.





	heartbreak | meanie

     "Wow, Wonu, I- You- You look amazing..."

"No I don't... You're only saying that because you have to."

"Just because I'm your best friend doesn't mean I have to do shit, Wonwoo. If I thought you looked bad, I'd tell you, dumbass."

"Sorry, I just figured that-"

"Wonwoo," Mingyu said sternly. "Look at me. I'm not like all your other friends. I'm not going to say things just to make you feel better. I'm not like that."

The older man nodded and looked down, mumbling a quick, "Sorry."

     Mingyu's entire demeanor changed at that small word. "Won, hey," he said, his voice a million times softer than it was not a second ago. He grabbed the other's hands, running his thumb over Wonwoo's knuckles as he spoke. "Please don't apologize... You have nothing to be sorry for."

"Are you sure?"

"As sure as I'll ever be," Mingyu whispered, pulling his best friend into a hug, drawing little circles on his back. "I love you, you don't need to apologize to me for not thinking as highly of yourself as I do."

Wonwoo nodded, squeezing Mingyu's torso before speaking into the taller's shoulder. "I love you too."

     And as much as Mingyu wanted him to mean it in the same way, he knew it was never going to happen. Wonwoo would never love him the way he loves Wonwoo. Every time Wonwoo says, "I love you, Gyu," it's like a stab in his heart. He knows it'll never be real, but it still sets him off each time those three words leaves his crush's pretty little lips.

     Wonwoo let go of the raven-haired male and began to walk out the door, Mingyu trailing after him like a lost puppy. He didn't want the brunette to leave and dreaded the moment a car honks its horn for Wonwoo.

_Honk honk!_

     "Seokmin's here, I gotta go."

"Bye, Wonu. Be safe and don't do anything stupid," Mingyu said, hugging his friend one more time. "Please," he said, so softly that he barely even heard it himself.

"I'll make sure I don't get pregnant, I have condoms just in case," Wonwoo laughed at his own joke, his fox-like eyes closing and his nose wrinkling up.

     Mingyu barely lifted one side of his mouth, tears prickling up.

"Yeah."

"I'll text you if I end up staying the night," the older called as he ran down the stairs. "Bye Gyu!"

     When the door closed in front of him, Mingyu stood there, numb. He refused to look away, even as his lips trembled and his shoulders heaved with emotion, unwilling to back down. His dark lashes brimmed heavy with tears; his hands clenched into shaking fists, in a desperate battle against the heartbreak. A lone tear traced down his cheek, and just like that, the floodgates opened. He wept, tears streaming from his deep brown eyes, loud, heaving sobs tearing from his throat, and still he did not look away. Not until the sobs drove him to his knees did his determined gaze fall.  

     It took only a second for all of his emotions to hit him, only a second for him to break down in his and Wonwoo's shared living room, only a second for his eyes to drown his cheeks in salty tears. He patted around the room blindly, looking for his phone through a curtain of tears. He pressed a contact name, not really knowing who's it was, hoping it was one of his friends.

      _"Hello?"_

"Ming- Minghao... I-"

_"Gyu, what's wrong?"_

"Everything hurts and- and I just want to- to die," Mingyu sobbed into the phone. "I can't breathe and everything is- is closing in on me, Hao please..."

_"You're home, right?"_

"Y-yes."

_"Stay right there where you are, I'm coming over. I'll be there in a minute."_

     Mingyu ended the call and sat in the floor, rocking himself back and forth slowly, head in between his knees, looking for some sort of comfort.

Not too much later, Minghao opened the door. "Oh, Gyu..."

     All Mingyu could do was sit up and look at Minghao, shaking and crying silently. Minghao almost threw himself on the floor in his haste to comfort Mingyu. He wrapped his arms around the older man and pulled him over so that most of his weight would be off of him and on Minghao.

The Chinese boy cooed to Mingyu, playing with his soft, black hair and holding him tightly to his chest. Mingyu's body shook with sobs, his tears staining Minghao's shirt. He kissed the top of Mingyu's head in a loving, brotherly way, as he has always done. The younger boy began humming, placing his head on top of Mingyu's momentarily, just to let him know he was still there.

      Mingyu sobbed into Minghao's chest unceasingly, hands clutching at his jacket. Minghao held him in silence, rocking him slowly as his tears soaked his chest. A tiny lapse let him pull away, blinking lashes heavy with tears, before he collapsed again, his howls of misery worsening. The pain must have come in waves, minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for recovering breaths, before hurling him back into the outstretched arms of his grief.

     When he cried there was a rawness to it, like the pain was still an open wound. He would clasp onto something for support, anything. This time it just so happened to be Minghao. Then his whole body would shake. The sobs were stifled at first as he attempted to hide his grief, then overcome by the wave of his emotions he would break down entirely, all his defenses washed away in those salty tears.

     When he at last turned his face to Minghao, he was a picture of grief, loss, devastation. His chest heaved up and down, and his body fell limp against the younger's.

"Hao..."

"I know, Gyu... I know it hurts. Let it all out," Minghao whispered to the older boy, wiping away his tears and placing his head back on his chest. Mingyu did not start crying again, he only clung onto Minghao's torso as if it were the last thing he'd ever do.

"Do you want me to call Soonyoung?"

Mingyu nodded almost robotically, lying on Minghao's chest.

     "Hey, Soon, you need to come to Mingyu's."

_"What? Why? What happ-"_

"I'll explain when you get here, just hur-"

     Minghao was interrupted by Mingyu losing himself again. From the broken man came the most hysterical crying, the screaming sobs only interrupted by his need to draw breath. It was a primal sound, one Minghao and Soonyoung were programmed not to ignore. Minghao turned his head, panicking.

 _"I'll be there in ten."_  

And with that, Soonyoung hung up, sprinting to his car.

     Minghao held the man with ebony hair tightly, not thinking about anything else but his best friend.

      Mingyu's loosing his mind for the second time that night. He can feel it unraveling, the threads of every happy memory he could ever once recall, all but a disarray of strings scattered about his feet. His sharp knees dig into the floor as he tries to ground himself, his hands unsteady as they silently claw at the soft fabric of Minghao's jacket. He opens his mouth, but not a sound comes out, his head violently quivering as if there is a drill to the back of his skull. His eyes see nothing; they have lost all sight of what is and what could have been. His mouth is open, an eternal silenced scream, saliva dripping from behind his teeth and onto the younger man's shoulders, stained with the memory of Wonwoo, the only person he had ever loved in such a way.

      Mingyu cried like there was too much raw pain inside him to be contained. He cried like his spirit needed to break loose from his skin, desperate to release an elemental rage on the world. The soothing words of Minghao made no difference at all. Mingyu was beyond all reason, beyond all natural methods of calming. 

"I can't- I can't keep- can't keep doing t-this," Mingyu wailed into the crook of Minghao's neck, hyperventilating. "Hao, I can't- can't- can't-"

"I know Gyu, I know," Minghao reassured him softly, placing a soft kiss on the older man's forehead. "You're gonna be okay. Soonyoung will be here in a minute."

"O-"

      _TingTingTing! TingTingTing! TingTingTing! TingTingTing!_

"Who- Who's texting?"

Minghao grabbed the phone, reading the screen. He quickly tossed it back onto the couch, knowing that what was in the text Mingyu had received was not a good thing right now.

"No one."

"It's Wonwoo, isn't- isn't it?"

Minghao could see the tears forming in Mingyu's eyes, ready to prepare another wave of vehement sobbing for him to choke on. Yet, Minghao couldn't lie to him.

"Yes, it is. Soonyoung and I are gonna stay with you tonight, okay?"

"What about Junhui and Jiho-?"

"They'll be fine by themselves, I promise."

     Mingyu stayed silent, trying not to cry again. "What did- What did the text say?"

"Nothing you need to know."

"He's staying over at Seokmin's tonight, isn't he? That's- That's why he's texting..."

Minghao nodded solemnly, and Mingyu's dams broke.

     Heart break is a funny thing. We all know it's going to happen, yet we're never prepared for it. We underestimate its power. Maybe that's why Mingyu is so distraught.

It's like giving a murderer a gun, and expecting not to be killed. Why are we never ready for it? 

Because we're in denial. We believe it won't happen. We believe the murderer will not kill us. We believe if we give him our hearts he will not crush it. Hearts shouldn't be crushed. They should be cherished and protected. 

If only someone had told Wonwoo that. If only someone had told Wonwoo that he even had Mingyu's heart in the first place. Maybe then, Mingyu wouldn't be as broken and conflicted as he is right now.

     On one hand, Mingyu never wants to see Wonwoo again, but on the other, he wants to kick in the door to Seokmin's apartment and confess his love to his best friend because he can't take it anymore.

     The desolation Mingyu felt was all consuming. His mind became an icy wasteland, the wind howled in his soul and wrapped freezing tentacles around his heart so tightly it almost stopped beating. 

     Oh, how Mingyu hated Wonwoo. He hated his stupid, bright smile, his sharp, dark eyes, his handsome complexion, his near-perfect body. Oh, how he hated the sound of his roommate's voice, his light footsteps, his thick, brown hair. Oh, how Mingyu hated Wonwoo. He hated that Wonwoo was so beautiful, so perfect that he drew nearly everyone to him. He hated that Wonwoo dated one person after another, never giving him any time to confess. He hated that Wonwoo always came to him for love advice. He hated that Wonwoo was not his.

     But oh, how Mingyu loved Wonwoo. He loved his stunning, shining smile, his sharp, sexy eyes, his handsome complexion, his absolutely perfect body. Oh, how he loved the sound of Wonwoo's deep, but quiet, voice, his soft footsteps, his thick, soft brown hair. Oh, how Mingyu loved Wonwoo. He loved how ethereal Wonwoo was. He loved that Wonwoo was a hard person to break when it came to relationships, which meant Mingyu never had to see him cry. He loved that Wonwoo thought he was helpful and talked to him regularly.

     Except none of that mattered any more as Mingyu held onto Minghao, his body racking with strained sobs. Soonyoung chose that moment to open the door, dropping his bags and dropping to the floor at the speed of light. He began to tear up, never imagining that he'd see Mingyu so broken. Minghao looked up at him, wide-eyed, shaking his head as if to say, "Soonyoung, don't cry, we're busy."

     Soonyoung nodded, pulling Mingyu onto his chest so that Minghao could go grab them all a glass of water. The older man kissed Mingyu's head repeatedly, cooing softly in between pecks. It seemed to calm the younger man down enough that he could talk.

"What happened, Gyu?"

"Soon... I can't keep doing- doing this. Wonwoo loves Seokmin, not- not me. Do you know how hard it is to be friends with the- with the boy you love?" Mingyu was talking into Soonyoung's chest, his friends listening intently. "It's so hard to pretend to be friends with someone-... someone special. Especially when every time you look at them, all you see is everything you want to have..."

     Mingyu looked up, tears streaking down his face. "All I want is Wonwoo..."

Soonyoung wiped the tears away. "Gyu, please don't cry again... Drink some water," he whispered to Mingyu, kissing his forehead again. The upset man drank each drop of the water Minghao brought him. He was so tired he couldn't keep his eyes open.

     "Let's get him to bed," Minghao spoke softly to Soonyoung, who helped Mingyu up, across the house, and into his bed. Just as they turned to leave the room, Mingyu called out to them hoarsely.

"Please don't leave..."

      So the other two men climbed into bed with Mingyu, wrapping their arms around the mentally drained boy, and together, the three friends fell asleep.

     Around three a.m., Wonwoo shuffled into his dark house. Tears stained his tan cheeks as he walked into his bedroom. He popped his head into Mingyu's room, only to find that Soonyoung and Minghao were in the bed as well.

"Good for him," Wonwoo mumbled to himself, throwing his things down on his bed. Why was tonight so rough? Seokmin had invited him over to meet his new boyfriend, Jisoo, which meant that his days of dating Seokmin were over. Then Wonwoo came home, hoping to talk to his best friend about it, only to find him in the bed with two other men.

     Truthfully, Wonwoo only really dated Seokmin to get his eyes and mind off Mingyu. Yes, he did have feelings for Seokmin, but he had more feelings for Mingyu.

     The next morning, Minghao and Soonyoung were making breakfast when Wonwoo got up.

"What time did you get here, Wonwoo?"

"Around three a.m.," he responded with a yawn. "I left on my own because Seokmin pretty much told me we were going on a date, then took me to meet his new boyfriend."

"Oh, I'm so sorry..."

"It's okay Hao. Anyway, so I came into the house, hoping Mingyu would still be up so I could conf- uhh- talk to him about everything, and instead I found you guys all in the bed." Wonwoo laughed stiffly. "There's a lot of things I thought Gyu would do while I was gone, but I never imagined that he'd have a threesome."

     Minghao choked on his coffee. "Wait, you think we gang-banged him? No way!"

Soonyoung couldn't stop himself from laughing. "Both of us have boyfriends and Gyu... Well, Gyu has his eyes set on someone."

Wonwoo felt his heart shatter. "Oh..."

"Do you still need to talk to him? He should be up," Minghao said lightly, sensing what Wonwoo was really upset about.

     So Wonwoo padded into Mingyu's room without a sound, the younger seeing him for only a second before he was pulled into a hug.

"Wonu, what are you doing?"

He got no response from the brunette, who tightened his grip on Mingyu.

"Won?"

Still no response but Wonwoo's head shifting slightly.

"Wonwoo?"

Wonwoo inhaled a slow, shaky breath. "I love you."

"I love you too, Wonu... What's wrong?"

     The older man closed his eyes, mentally preparing himself for what he was about to do. "Us, Gyu. That's what's wrong. No matter how many guys and girls I date, I can't forget you. I can't stop loving you. I know you have your eyes on someone, but goddamn it Gyu, I love you so much," Wonwoo spoke while tears escaped his scared eyes. "I cry myself to sleep every night because when I say 'I love you,' I mean it in a completely different way."

     Mingyu was frozen, unable to react. He could only stare as Wonwoo talked, but right as he got up to leave the room, the black headed man's hand shot out, closing around the shorter's wrist. He stood up quickly, pulling Wonwoo forward and almost literally slamming their lips together. When the two pulled back for air, Mingyu cupped Wonwoo's face in his hands.

"I've always meant it the same. I love you Wonu, I'm so in love with you. I had a breakdown after you left because I felt like I'd never have you. That's why Minghao and Soonyoung are here."

"Mingyu, I-... Why didn't you tell me? I would've never even left last night."

"I was scared, I was so afraid I'd lose you."

Wonwoo pressed their foreheads together. "I love you so much, I regret not telling you sooner..."

"Hey, Wonu, it's okay, I know now, please don't cry."

     After Wonwoo finished explaining everything to Mingyu, they sent Minghao and Soonyoung home. The younger man wasn't sure what had gotten hold of them, but up until this moment, he'd never kissed someone more than he did that day. It was almost as if they were making up for all the lost time. Making up for all the chances they had.

     And for the first time in almost twenty-four hours, Mingyu was okay. He was happy. He was calm. He was in love. The boy he thought would never be his is now exactly that. For some reason, all of this made him feel so much better. Just knowing that Wonwoo, the single most beautiful man that he had ever seen, was his, he felt lightened. Knowing that he could say "I love you," and mean it the way he wants to is more than he could ever ask for. Wonwoo is more than he could ever ask for, more than he thinks he deserves.

     Mingyu was euphoric, all because of one man, and he wouldn't have it any other way.


End file.
